i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Randomize
