So drunk its hurt
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
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