he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
