i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Randomize
