does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
