i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Randomize
