and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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