I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
