its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
