Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Small penises have feelings too.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Randomize
