it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
