Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
The best revenge is premature balding
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
