So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
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