Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Randomize
