I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
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