just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Randomize
