Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Randomize
