never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
