i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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