no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
