all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
dude. I can hear the air.
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