my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
