Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
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