Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
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