I just made out with a guy for $7.
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Randomize
