I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
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