But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
I am in a vortex of obligation.
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
