When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
where am i from again
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
