Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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