this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
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