Umm I'm too high to move.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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