That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
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