i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
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