Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
My bed smells like the plague
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
