tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
Randomize