Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
