Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
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