I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Randomize
