I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Randomize
