Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Randomize