how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
