mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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