so explain again why im purple
no
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
