GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
how drunk are you?
Several
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
