I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
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