When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
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