i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
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