do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Randomize
