She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
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