Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
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