Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
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